invincible summers

in the middle of winter I at last discovered that there was in me an invincible summer. (albert camus)

happy thanksgiving November 27, 2008

Filed under: life — clementine @ 8:33 pm
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it was a bittersweet thanksgiving.
i thought of my family most of the day.
we debated spending the money making a big dinner but decided the leftovers would last a week and would equal less than what we would spend on groceries. and thanks to the new trader joe’s in town, it wasn’t that pricey after all.


trader joe’s brined turkey
corn casserole
roasted sweet potatoes with maple syrup, orange and spices (via
yeast rolls
cornbread stuffing
mashed red potatoes with garlic
pumpkin chocolate chip squares (thank you martha stewart)

happy thanksgiving everyone.


fall…winter…life November 25, 2008

Filed under: family,life,love,pain — clementine @ 1:03 am
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i have always loved fall. there is something about the crisp, colorful leaves that brings me much joy. i have fond memories of raking big piles of leaves as a child (or my father would rake them) and my sister and i would jump in them. there is a picture on my refrigerator and i’m guessing i was about seven, my father is standing there with a rake next to a pile of those crisp, colorful leaves and i’m just sitting in the middle of the pile. i was happy and innocent then. maybe that’s why i love fall so much.

it’s cold here and we’ve been building fires, they are very comforting. another reminder of the past i suppose. as i type i see our cat has left his blanket near the fire and is lying on the marble, as close as he can get to the fire. we, of course, keep a good eye on him…but he too, loves the comfort and warmth of a nice fire.

our first fire of the year…

and now winter is approaching…the holidays…and there is a feeling of emptiness inside. my heart is still breaking. at this moment, i’m thinking of my mother’s stuffing and her jingling sweaters. thursday i will make her corn casserole and think of her. but i will make it for my husband, who loves corn. soon we’ll put up the christmas tree. a tree which we will decorate with ornaments that all bring back so many beautiful memories of the past. i’ve been told i shouldn’t live in the past (and i don’t think i do) however, the past should live within us all, the good and bad. i don’t want to erase the past. i don’t want to forget those memories. i want to forever remember them. all of them. and so, as i hang the ornaments this year, i will remember the good times.

and i will smile while fighting back the inevitable tears.


all things big pharma

Filed under: antipsychotics,big pharma,FDA — clementine @ 12:27 am
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I’ve been reading a lot of interesting posts over at the WSJ health blog. Here they discuss the pressure to curb antipsychotic use in kids. and here is an old but interesting Q & A where child psychiatrist Christoph Correll actually said, “Kids will have more sedation from antipsychotics. They will have more stiffness. The biggest problem is that kids are more sensitive to weight gain and metabolic disorders. Studies have also shown that youngsters (who take Risperdal) are at higher risk for hormonal dysregulation. However, the long-term effects of this are still unclear.”

I find it simply amazing and outrageous that doctors just don’t seem to give a damn about long-term effects especially when the short-term effects are already bad enough. Are we a bunch of guinea pigs? They should be paying us to take these drugs not the other way around. Instead me and thousands of others have gone nearly broke paying for medications (in my case for nearly two decades) that doctors don’t seem to know a thing about. I doubt most even care. We know psychiatrists are paid off by the pharmaceutical companies. I would guess many patients know more about the medication(s) they are taking than their own doctor. Something is not right with this equation.

What happened to a little thing called the Hippocratic Oath?!?
Also, what is going on at the FDA?

And now…we have learned big pharma is paying off psychiatrist and radio host, Dr. Frederick K. Goodwin. Senator Charles E. Grassley, Republican of Iowa, has uncovered the famous “The Infinite Mind” radio host is financially tied to several pharmaceutical companies. Click here for the full story.

When will this disgusting madness end?


another pharma whistleblower November 13, 2008

Filed under: big pharma,FDA,medications — clementine @ 3:16 am

Tom Nesi used to be the director of public affairs at Bristol-Myers Squibb. He quit and wrote a book, Poison Pills: The Untold Story of the Vioxx Drug Scandal.

from us news, here are a couple excerpts from the interview:

Q: As a veteran drug marketer, you warn consumers to beware huge marketing campaigns for new drugs. In fact, you urge people to ask their doctors for proof that new drugs are superior to older ones before accepting a prescription for the newer medicine.

A: I would say the larger the marketing campaign, the more you should use caution. I would also say if there are good drugs in a category—in a type of illness that you suffer from—that have been out there for a while, there’s no reason not to use those first.

Q: This book seems the antithesis, in some ways, of your life’s work. Why did you write it?

A: My wife died about six years ago. She was very young, and she died of brain cancer. I went through experimental drugs, the talking to doctors—just about everything you can think of—and I found out that it was bogus. [Marketing medicines] was my life’s career, and it forced me to really [re-]evaluate. I just didn’t want to get out there anymore and tell people such-and-such a drug was a miracle compound when I knew that, (a) it wasn’t, and (b) even if it was helping people, it was destroying their quality of life. So it caused me an entire career change—it just changed not just my career but my entire life. We’re being duped.


from 52 to 48 with love November 6, 2008

Filed under: 2008 election,change,government,hope,life — clementine @ 1:11 pm

everyone should click on this LINK.

(you’ll find my mr. there as well, the abraham lincoln note)


president obama November 4, 2008

Filed under: 2008 election,change,new beginnings,peace,politics — clementine @ 11:56 pm
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there are no words to describe tonight. i will try.

i spent the past two days door-to-door canvassing and met some amazing people. i’ll never forget their faces, their kind words and even those that slammed the door in my face. as i walked the streets and passed boarded up homes and children with no shoes, i was hoping and praying for this moment.

not only did obama (and we the people) win, we won by a landslide. we can all sleep well tonight knowing we will not awake to find it was all a lie.

the negative ads and phrases like, “palling around with terrorists” did not work this time. they might have frightened my 86 year old grandmother but they did not frighten more than 50% of the American people.

tonight history was made. from this moment on…children of all colors can aspire to be President of the United States. and that is a beautiful, beautiful thing.

tonight i will pray for those who are too afraid to open their eyes to see what kind of man obama is. i will pray for those who are afraid to open their ears to hear what obama is saying. and i will pray for those who are afraid to open their minds…because if they did…they would know America just elected a man who will bring great change to our country and beyond. We elected a man who will UNITE us. fight for us. inspire and encourage us. There is nothing more patriotic than that.