invincible summers

in the middle of winter I at last discovered that there was in me an invincible summer. (albert camus)

a message to sarah palin September 2, 2008

Filed under: 2008 election,life,pain,politics — clementine @ 4:34 pm
Tags: , , ,

In November 2006, then gubernatorial candidate Sarah Palin declared that she would not support an abortion for her own daughter even if she had been raped. Granting exceptions only if the mother’s life was in danger, Palin said that when it came to her daughter, “I would choose life.”

This is my message to Ms. Palin:

I was brutally raped at 15. It was such a traumatic experience that I completely blocked it from my memory for nearly 4 years. Suddenly (and something did trigger it) moments of that night flooded my mind. I spent years and years in therapy, very little of which was covered by my insurance company.

Oddly enough I wanted to remember the entire evening, I didn’t want the bits and pieces. A therapist told me, “your mind will only remember what you can handle” and I have lived with that reality. I floated through life struggling with that reality for the next 15 years. During those years I was lost and never in a relationship. However, I consider myself one of the lucky ones. I found a great career after much sadness and struggle. And recently, almost 20 years after the rape, I found a man who loves me…a good man.

However, I cannot imagine adding a child to my equation. It was difficult enough living with the memories of that brutal night. It was extremely difficult going through the very long healing phase. If I had become pregnant from that experience, that child would certainly be a reminder of a horrible evening that ended with me in a bathtub, wearing nothing but a bloody t-shirt. That night changed me. A soccer star who quit the team. A smart girl who couldn’t finish college. A girl afraid to sleep at night unless she kept a knife under her mattress. A trusting girl who suddenly trusted no one. If I was forced to raise a child from that experience-I don’t think I would have made it. Suicide would have most definitely been an option. I know some might say that child could have healed me. I beg you to put yourself in my shoes, in any raped girl’s shoes…what if that child had his nose? his mouth? his eyes? those eyes that still haunt my dreams. The fear and pain would never subside. I don’t wish that pain on anyone.

Think about that, Ms. Palin.

p.s. I’m sure your answer would be, your friends, family and your local church would have surrounded you with support and love. I beg to differ. My church-going parents and sister will not talk about my rape. Most of my friends remain silent when I mention it. I feel like the bad guy, imagine how that child would feel??? This is not your choice or the government’s choice. This is a woman’s choice.


3 Responses to “a message to sarah palin”

  1. Brittany Says:

    Perhaps not all families and friends know how to support that kind of thing. But a rape victum could still give the child up for adoption. People want the death penalty for those who kill young children but want free choice for those who kill the unborn. By killing a child who also had no choice it would be just as wrong as the rape you went through. God provides support, including mental support, for those who have strong faith in him. A child weather born or unborn is still a child. It is alive inside of you with a heart beat. Many people chose to abort children when it is further along in development. Baby’s even in the womb are alive. What about those lives that are lost because a mother decides at the last minute that she doesn’t want a child anymore and she gives partial birth to the child and allows the doctore to put a whole in its brain and kill it. What about those who use abortion as a form of birth control. Not all abortions are as inocent as a poor young women like yourself who was raped, there are more abortions from women and teens who just choose not to keep their legs closed. Is that right? Is it right for an innocent baby to die in that way? We say it is okay for partial birth abortions and other abortions that kill innocent lives but when a 2 year old child is killed it is a problem? What is the difference, they are both children, and both killed. They both deserve the same option to live and both deserve the same justice when they are killed.

  2. clementine Says:

    “Perhaps not all families and friends know how to support that kind of thing.” Your first sentence pretty much summed up part of my point. “that kind of thing” is offensive to any victim of rape or abuse.

    Secondly, we are ALL entitled to our beliefs and we can all agree to disagree. We have that choice and freedom in America. However, abortion is and should always be a women’s choice. Not yours. Not mine. Not your neighbor’s choice. And certainly not the government’s choice.

    I would be curious to hear your thoughts on the war in Iraq. We ship men and women off every day to be murdered and yet that seems to be OK. My 19 year old cousin died in this war and although I respect him and I miss him, he did not die for freedom. There were no WMD’s. We did not attack the country or people that attacked us on 9/11. And certain people (the murderers) knew this all along. 2,001 days after we declared “victory” American soldiers are still dying. And lets not forget the thousands of innocent men, women and children that have been MURDERED in Iraq-for what? Money and power.

    Jesus Christ was a man of PEACE. Not war, not hate.

  3. jtb Says:

    Wow, Brittany…while I absolutely respect your religious views, you have ABSOLUTELY no right to try and force those views on the rest of our country. It sure would be nice if most Christians in this country actually followed the example of Christ (who, by the way, was a Jewish revolutionary. He lead a revolt against Roman rule). Christ’s message, like that of Buddha, was one of peace and understanding.
    Also, there is a wonderful thing built into our system of government. It’s commonly referred to as the separation of church and state. It is clearly stated by the framers of our Constitution (many of whom were Deists, by the way, not Christians) religion has NO PLACE in our government. We are a society, nay, a nation, of many religions, ethnicities, genders, etc. Everyone is welcome here. Perhaps, if you would set your Bible aside for a bit and read the Constitution of The United States of America, you would better understand this.
    Also, based on your myriad misspellings, perhaps it would behoove you to take a look at a dictionary from time to time. Or at least use your spell check. It just makes you come across as even more ignorant.
    To say that a woman who has been raped or the victim of incest, and becomes pregnant as the result of such a vile, painful, and hideous act should be FORCED to carry that child to term is not only unconstitutional, but absurd as well. The Supreme Court of the United States guaranteed all women the right to choose via Roe v. Wade citing the Constitution’s guarantees of the right to privacy (in this case the privacy of a woman’s decision made with her physician).
    20 years ago, my wife was raped. It is something that, to this day, she struggles to deal with. Had she become pregnant as a result of that vicious attack and forced to carry that child, I can’t even begin to imagine the damage that would have caused her.
    As a practitioner of Buddhism (a religion FAR older than, and that heavily influenced, Christianity), it is my prayer for you, ma’am, that neither you nor anyone on this earth should ever have to face such a horrendous experience.

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